To live longer, do what "The Girls" do

There is nothing like an enduring female friendship. Multiply that by 10 and you have something incredibly special. I recently read The Girls from Ames and I noticed that even though I don’t know these women personally, I was deeply touched. I related to their struggles, their triumphs and the everyday ho hum details of their lives. I also couldn’t help but think about the similarities within my own friendships.

Maintaining friendships is one of the things at the top of my list. Studies show that women who have strong female friendships also have stronger immune systems, are better able to deal with stress and even have higher self-esteem. Those reasons are more than enough to justify a monthly or even weekly night out with friends. Add in the laughter, shared experience and a bit of wine and it becomes a no-brainer to get together with your friends regularly.

Here are the traits I noticed in the friendships of the women in The Girls from Ames that I also strive for in my own friendships:

• Genuine admiration for each other
• The ability to note and acknowledge differences and then accept them
• Either a shared history, an unspoken understanding or, even better, both
• Loyalty even through differences of opinion
• Increased individual confidence which is bolstered by being a part of a group who knows and loves you
• Increased self-awareness and self-acceptance

As I read this book, I realized that since I’m lucky enough to have similar deep and long-lasting friendships, I really want to do a great job of nurturing them. The Girls from Ames gives me a blueprint to work from and inspires me to keep those relationships going. There is research that says if women are still friends at age 40, there’s a strong likelihood they’ll be lifelong friends. If that’s true, things are looking good for me!

If you struggle to find the time to hang with your girlfriends, reread the benefits above and then get out your calendar right now to schedule a get together.

Comments

[bethany]

looks like a good one! so true, and I feel so lucky. I have a good handful of girlfriends that i've known forever (since 10 or before) and we all can still tell each other anything when we do get together. the times are rare, but so very precious. all those things you mentioned hold true, and the "loyalty even through differences of opinion" seems to get stronger as we get older and the differences increase in many ways. (we all met thru church as kids). girlfriends rock!

[Erin Dullea]

This post inspired me. I made a commitment to myself to schedule a date with an old friend of mine. The very next morning, I received an e-mail from her insisting that we get together ASAP! I love the way the universe works!